Better Together: Finding Strength in Community as a New Mom

Better Together: Finding Strength in Community as a New Mom

Around here, we think of motherhood as a team sport. Raising children can often feel like a task fit for an Olympian (without the gold medals). Having loved ones to help carry the load isn’t a luxury. It's crucial. Whoever said it takes a village—well, they were right. We asked Solly’s Head of Social and mom to 6 month-old Norah to share a little bit about her own village. Here’s what she said…

Beige background with 3 photos of women holding babies

It’s hard to put into words how special it is to go through the same season of life with some of your closest friends. But I’m going to try my best.

Woman with long blond hair smiles and embraces baby sitting on her lap

The One Who Goes Way Back

One of my closest friends and college roommate is mom-extraordinaire. Emma and her husband, Will, started fostering soon after they got married and have welcomed 18 kiddos into their home over the years. They gave birth to their daughter in 2021 and adopted their son in 2022.

Throughout my pregnancy and into motherhood, Emma answered all of my “Is this normal?!” questions, basically built my entire baby registry, and supported me with thoughtful gifts and encouragement regularly. Even though we don’t live near each other, she’s the friend who’s always there when I need her. The friend who sent me an “N” necklace (my daughter’s name is Norah) when I started my third trimester, Venmoed me so I could go get a little treat the week before my due date, sent us a monogrammed bow for Norah to celebrate her first week of life, and a DoorDash gift card to participate in our MealTrain from afar.

Having a friend who’s gone through it all before and continues to show up for me, even long-distance, is special. And it’s pushed me to be a better friend and support to other new moms in this stage of life.

2 women smile with arms around each other. Woman on the right is holding her baby in a Mist Solly Wrap

The Ones in My Group Text

I have two friends who were due the month before me, and our three babes are all about two weeks apart. This is the group text where we are trading notes. Is your baby having trouble sleeping? Have either of you started losing your hair? Help, my baby keeps rolling and won’t sleep. Have you tried this? Worked for me!

Having them slightly ahead of me has helped me anticipate what’s coming. Stella had a tooth pop through? Maybe Norah is about to start teething. Cade keeps rolling and not sleeping? Maybe that’s next for Norah!

While all babies are different—no one’s journey is linear—it's helpful to hear their experiences and give me at least a sense of preparedness (whether I’m actually prepared or not!). Both of these friends moved back home after having their babies, but the group chat has stayed strong.

3 women stand together will arms around each other and smile. The women on the left and right are holding babies with their free arm.

The Ones Who Live Down the Street

Two of my closest friends had babies 10 and 20 weeks after me. We’ve been friends for years and all live within walking distance of each other. These gals are my—dare I say—ride or dies in motherhood. They’ve given me constant encouragement, daily check-ins and are the best aunties to Norah.

Our group text is constantly buzzing with the latest updates (or cutest and newest thing) our babies did. We have a shared photo album so we can drop in photos of the three babes altogether. Matching outfits and summer vacations have been planned. We often talk about how lucky we are to have healthy babies, amazing husbands, and each other.

I could not do it without them. It’s been fun for me to see them through each new phase of motherhood because it wasn’t long ago I was experiencing the same thing. And what I’ve learned from the moms before me, I’ve gotten to share with them. I’m only six months into this whole motherhood thing, so I’m no expert, but it’s been sweet to hear them going through something and be able to say, “I know it’s hard right now, but it won’t be that way forever.”

We’ve all gotten a front row seat to watch each other take on this new role, go through ups and downs, transform into strong, beautiful, resilient mothers. We’ve laughed and cried together. Annie and Becca are family. Like I said, I’m not great with words, so I’m not doing justice to the immense gratitude and respect I have for them. Thankful is an understatement. I could not do this without them.

Blond woman holds up baby with black hair outside and smile

The One Who I Call Mom

I can’t write this without acknowledging my own mom. We’ve always been close and I’ve always thought the world of her. But becoming a mom myself has given me an entire new appreciation for her—and how she’s loved and raised her kids. It’s like I met this entirely new side of my mom for the first time. There’s nothing she wouldn’t do for me, and while I’ve known that, it became crystal clear to me after becoming a mom.

When I had Norah, she stayed with us for almost two weeks. Made us meals, took the night shifts, told me it was okay to cry when things felt hard, and to trust my gut. I remember in those first few weeks when I felt overwhelmed, didn’t know what to do, started to panic, etc., and my mom was always there to gently remind me to let go of expectations and to trust my instincts. There were several moments I can remember where she could have easily inserted her own opinion but instead has given me space to process and build my confidence as a mom. She’s been my biggest supporter (and the very best Goldie to Norah!). I love you, mom.

Motherhood changes you. It’s hard and it can sometimes be difficult to see past the moment you’re in, so having women who have walked the path before me brings perspective. It is also beautiful and fulfilling—and getting to figure it out alongside your best friends? Well, there’s nothing like it. 

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