With Thanksgiving around the corner, talk of gratitude often amps up. Kids come home from school with art projects centered around thankfulness, time is carved out during meals for everyone to share words of gratitude, and social feeds are filled on Thanksgiving Day with posts marked by contentedness. But how can we cultivate that sense of gratitude in our families year-round, not just when a festive occasion calls for it?
Though our parenting styles may look different, most of can agree that we want to raise content children who are grateful for all they’ve been given. Beyond it’s clear social value, science shows that gratitude has a whole host of benefits for kids and parents alike, including: improved mental and physical health, higher self-esteem, and an increased sense of happiness. (Sign us up!)
Here, we’re sharing three tips for raising grateful children that you can implement right away—whether you’re in the early years of parenthood with a newborn, in the thick of toddler-dom, or you’re parenting school-age kids.
Tip 01: Model thankfulness
We know that children see, children do. Parents are children’s first role models. To raise a grateful child, you need to walk the walk. Use every chance you get to lead by example.
Here are several ways you can model gratitude for your children:
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This one is so obvious, you might roll your eyes. But first on the list: Say thank you. Often. To the clerk bagging your groceries at the store. To the barista making your morning coffee. To your child after they clear the table. To your spouse when they wash dishes. As your child sees you thank others routinely, they’ll do the same.
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Share what you’re grateful for often. And perhaps most importantly, share during times when it might seem like it’s hard to find things to be grateful for. For example, instead of complaining about rainy weather, you might share that you’re happy the plants are being watered. Or that rainy days are great opportunities to get cozy inside and bake something yummy or watch a movie together.
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Express your gratitude non-verbally. Take time to write a thank you note or send a token of appreciation to someone in the form of a small gift or a batch of homemade cookies dropped at their door. Include the kids by having them sign their name on the card, helping bake the cookies, or coming with you as you drop them off.
Tip 02: Perform random acts of kindness
There are many things your child can do to show appreciation for other people. This might involve returning a favor, like loaning a toy to a friend who is kind. Talk about how there are many ways to show people that you’re grateful for all they do. You might even decide to take on a family project, like writing thank you letters to the first responders in your community after a natural disaster. Make it clear that you don’t need to reserve gratitude for those individuals that you know personally—there are many people in the community whom you might feel grateful for as well.
Tip 03: Create a family gratitude project
A family project can be a good way to get everyone involved in expressing gratitude. Some examples would be:
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Create a family gratitude board where everyone can add notes about what they’re thankful for. Whether you use sticky notes, a whiteboard where everyone writes with a marker, or colorful pages that can be tacked up, it’s a fun exercise for the whole family.
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You could also create a gratitude jar that everyone contributes to. Keep a jar in an easily accessible place, like the kitchen, and keep some slips of paper handy. Encourage everyone to write down something they’re grateful for and put it in the jar. Gather together regularly to read them together.
Tip 04: Celebrate the little things
Make it a point to celebrate everyday things. It sets a positive tone. Do it when you sit down for dinner or when all of you sit together and catch up. Have each family member—including children and adults—share something nice, big or small, that they experienced that day. Enjoy the feeling. And make it a daily habit.
When we make a concerted effort to draw attention to “gratitude moments” that occur throughout our days, it helps our kids create a habit of doing the same.
We'll go first...
We couldn't write an entire blog post without sharing something we're grateful for: you! The parents (and babies and grandparents and friends and gift-givers...and the list goes on!) that make up our Solly community are a special crew, and we're so thankful you're part of it.
