We’ve all heard the saying “the grass is greener on the other side,” right? Well, we have a different perspective for you: The grass is greener where you water it.
In life, we find ourselves constantly looking around for something better— better job, bigger house, nicer car. It starts to seem like we're standing in weeds while just beyond our reach there is lush green grass.
In fact, the more attention we pay to the green grass all around us, the uglier the weeds under our feet become. And why wouldn't they? We're watering everywhere but where we are standing. We spend hours lamenting what if, all the while ignoring what is.
Life is built in very small moments. One single moment might not feel that important, but once you start thinking that you can do better, then you begin a cascade of not committing to the life you have, of lamenting your surroundings instead of cherishing them, and building resentment rather than gratitude.
One of just a few things in this world over which we do have a great deal of control is our own mindsets. To wait for your life to be different before you allow yourself to feel happy is to essentially say that your happiness is determined by your circumstances. This mindset gives away a lot of personal power.
We’ve said it before: Motherhood is a garden. It is both fragile and life-giving and requires attention and nurturing. The moment we stop tending to ourselves, or our “garden,” we begin to wither.
Try creating your own set of theories around what you need to feel balanced and test them out.
- How do you feel?
- Was your idea too much, too little, or just enough?
This trial and error can take some time and attention. It means cultivating trust in yourself by having an idea and not being too afraid to test it out and see how it feels, even if it’s something that no one else around you has considered. Practice listening to your own sense of enoughness each day. Notice what makes you feel connected. Practice listening to your sense of enoughness with other things in life, too. Just because everyone in your office works 50+ hours each week doesn’t mean that this lifestyle is healthiest for you. By directly honoring our needs and emotions, we learn how to take good care of our gardens.
The weeds we see in our own backyard are rolling fields to others, and vice versa. There is nothing wrong with seeking greener pastures. The mistake is not recognizing that the greatest world is often right under our feet. The grass is always greener where you water it.