Darius Ewing wears a lot of hats: city councilman, professional, husband, and soon-to-be father of two.
But as he and his wife, Hannah, prepare to welcome a baby boy any day now, his focus is less on the responsibilities that fill his calendar and more on the people waiting for him at home. Fatherhood has reshaped the way Darius approaches nearly everything, teaching him a lesson he returns to often: most things can wait.
We caught up with Darius to talk about fatherhood, balancing family life and public service, and the kind of legacy he hopes to leave through the family he's raising.
Let's start with a quick introduction. Tell us a little bit about yourself, your family, and what this season of life looks like right now as you prepare to welcome your second baby.
My name is Darius Ewing and I’m the luckiest guy in the world. My wife, Hannah is an incredible mom to our daughter Norah (our almost three-year-old) and it’s been so cool to see them both through this second pregnancy. In this season we’re largely chilling. We spent a lot of the second trimester traveling around the state for weddings, weekend getaways, and seeing family, so this last month with nothing on the calendar but spending time with one another, and close friends has been the most refreshing way to prep for a major shake-up here shortly.
Your second child (a boy!) is due on Father's Day—a pretty special coincidence. How are you feeling as you get ready to become a dad of two?
It’s so cool to have a kid come on (or around) father’s day. Definitely a special thing he and I will always share, and hopefully one day he’ll get the chance to be a father and be celebrated on this birthday, twice over. This specific father’s day however it would be ridiculous for me to attempt to siphon any of the praise or attention away from my wife, who will certainly be carrying the load for our family come due date.
Your daughter Norah is almost three. What has fatherhood taught you during these first few years of being her dad?
First off, Norah is legitimately the greatest kid to ever live. Her baby brother has some huge shoes to fill (I’ve no doubt he will). With that being said, from the day we brought her home I’ve probably repeated one refrain to myself upwards of 10,000 times: “It can wait.” I can get easily distracted, but also can’t really rest until I feel like everything is done, so I’ll go into the kitchen to fill up my water bottle and notice that the dishwasher is done, so now I’ve got to unload that before I can go sit back down. Being wired that way means it takes me 5-10 minutes longer to leave the house or sit down and be with my family. Once she got here though, it became really clear that Norah didn’t care if the sink was full after cooking, table was dirty after eating, and it could wait. I’ll have all the time I want for so many years once she’s older, but for now, most things can wait.
You balance family life alongside a demanding career and your role as a city councilman. How do you stay present at home when so many people are competing for your time and attention?
Between City Council, my day job, and my family, it’s definitely difficult to balance everything. I feel an obligation to my constituents for taking their time and their vote and electing me to office. I feel an obligation to my employer because they pay my bills and have an expectation that I perform. And I obviously feel a deep obligation to my family. My wife and daughter couldn't tell you what I actually do on a day to day basis, and I don’t think they need to because when I’m home the only jobs I have are husband and father. I try really hard to balance all three of my primary obligations but definitely fail sometimes, but it’s important to always remember you can’t give more of yourself to one thing without taking away from another, so if it’s ever out of balance, I strive to make that up quickly. If there’s ever a time where it gets out of balance for too long, I’ll have to evaluate which of them (career or council) should be moved on from. Short answer though, we have a digital family calendar that governs our lives.
Many dads today are striving to be more hands-on and emotionally engaged than ever before. Was there a particular example of fatherhood that shaped you, or are you creating your own blueprint as you go?
That’s a really great question. I think every dad is equipped with all they can be before they have kids, and that looks different for everyone. My dad was certainly equipped differently than I was by the time Norah got here. But he made time every summer to wake us up and head to the lake and fish for hours on end. It didn’t matter day or night, he was game to wake us up at midnight and go fishing for catfish or wake up at 6 to get at the bass before it got too hot. I think there’s part of a blueprint there, and like every generation, I hope to take that and build on it. My best friend’s dad, Roy, was another example I got to see as his oldest were in high school and college and his youngest was in diapers. The ways he was available to them were obviously vastly different. I think there’s a blueprint there as well, that you can’t one size fits all yourself with your kids regardless of age or sensibility. So I hope to be engaged and involved with my kids in ways that are impactful, and memorable to them.
You spend a lot of time serving your community. How do your roles as a father and public servant influence one another?
I remember after Norah was born feeling like all the work I did for the city was at once, incredibly trivial, and equally important. Since becoming a dad, I think that I have a much more holistic view on the struggles and joys that so many of my constituents face. It’s definitely inspired me to make Waco not only a better place for Norah to grow up, but kids and families across Waco. David Byrne from The Talking Heads once said something to the effect that if you can make a city that works for a family with kids, it will work for everybody. That’s not to say that prior to having kids I was ignorant to the struggles or wishes of parents and families, but it’s definitely shaped my views from lived experiences now.
As you prepare to welcome another child, what values or lessons do you hope your children carry with them as they grow up?
I really just hope they can be honest and kind, take life in stride, and find a way to laugh every day.
What has your partnership with your wife taught you about teamwork in this season of parenting?
I’ve gotten to take some of the Norah duties off Hannah’s plate and get a new perspective into what a day looks like when you have daycare drop-off and pick-up. What it means to be the parent who rushes Norah to the bathroom when she says she’s got to go potty in public. I typically do our cooking and grocery shopping so that hasn’t changed, and I think for Hannah this go round, her biggest contribution is having fewer food aversions. Although her letting me spend an hour cooking dinner only to take two bites during her pregnancy with Norah did a great job prepping me for mealtime with a toddler. Overall, I’d say the thing about teamwork in this season of life is you’ve got to function as one as much as possible. Understanding that even if something doesn’t seem like it’s good for you, but it’s good for your partner, it’s worth getting done so everyone can feel taken care of when we’re all doing a bit more than usual until our little guy gets here.
When your children look back on their childhood someday, what do you hope they remember most about you?
That I was always a soft place to land.
Rapid-fire q's!
Favorite thing Norah does right now: Says “or something?” when asking a question. Like “Do you want food or something?”or “Are you scared or something?”
Current favorite family tradition: Saturday morning pancakes
Most-played song in your house lately: Changes every 72 hours. But “I Always Wanted a Brother” from the Mufasa soundtrack has pulled ahead lately (fitting).
Coffee order: Espresso for here, drip coffee to go
Favorite meal to cook: Pork Al Pastor Tacos or a smash burger
Last thing you ordered online: St. Louis Cardinals onesie
Current podcast recommendation: Optimist Economy
Current phone camera roll is mostly: Low back and hip stretches, and Norah
One word that describes fatherhood right now: Swell
