Breastfeeding often feels like a taboo topic. The time and energy mothers devote to nursing, as well as the joys and hardships associated with it, are rarely—if ever—acknowledged. But we’re hoping to change that, one story at a time. In honor of breastfeeding mothers around the world, our Leaked series shares real stories from our community. Here, Lexi Chase, a mom of two in Waco, TX, shares about her milk coming in against all odds after a traumatic birth experience that required life-saving care.   

Breastfeeding has been one of the sweetest parts of motherhood for me. 

With my first baby, it was honestly blissful. We had such a smooth journey, and I cherished it—the slowness it forced me into, the bonding, the gift of nourishing him with my body. I ended up weaning him around 15 months when I got pregnant with my second, and my supply started to dip. It was bittersweet, but I felt peace because I knew I’d get to do it again soon.

Then my second baby was born—and it was a wild birth!

I had a beautiful VBAC, which felt empowering, but right after birth we discovered I’d had a rare uterine rupture in the back of my uterus. I lost about 80% of my blood during all the chaos. When I woke up from emergency life-saving surgery and the doctors had told me what had happened one of my first questions was when can I breastfeed him? They kindly and gently told me that the chances of my milk coming in is highly unlikely. Because my body had to prioritize survival, I was told that secondary or nonessential bodily functions would be de-prioritized as a result of the blood loss. But that didn’t stop me! I even remember the hospital lactation consultant coming in and gently telling me, “It would be a miracle if your milk came in.” I was devastated. It felt like another loss stacked on top of an already overwhelming experience.

But I couldn’t let go of the hope. My husband asked all of our friends and family to pray. We upped my iron (thank you beef liver capsules + staying hydrated + well nourished through GOOD food) and I rested as best as I could. Tried to keep constant stimulation for that brain/breast connection. When we continued to hope, the lactation consultant tried to set our expectations again saying “If this happens then I will put you in the book I write one day.”

And on day four, against all odds, my milk came in.  !!!!!!

I never thought I would cry tears of joy over leaky, engorged boobs—but I did. It truly felt like a miracle. Almost every time I nurse now, I feel that same wave of gratitude. It continues to be healing for me—body and mind. It’s no longer something I assume will come easily or naturally—it’s something I hold with reverence. A true gift from God.